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Thursday, September 30, 2010


So....I had an epiphany. Last night while winding down watching my homegirl Oprah, I had an epiphany. She was interviewing Jenny McCarthy and she was discussing her breakup with Jim Carey. She said 'you lose who you are when you are in a relationship'.

*Light Bulb came on*

I thought to myself ever since my daughter(she's 3), I've lost my mojo! No will to learn, no drive to succeed and that led to me eating more, being lazy, just blah at work and not willing to push past it...I was always building someone else up, yet remaining stagnant. When I turned off my television, I thought: my husband is in school working on another degree(full on support on my part). I'm teaching my daughter how to recognize letters of the alphabet, numbers, matching, memory games, how to write and my son is 1 and he's all over the place, so we are not sitting down learning much, so when is there time for me?

Stuck in the routine of life, up, kids, work, kids, cook, baths, bed. My daily routine...I'm still alive right! No, date night with the hanging out with girlfriends...just routine and a boring one at that.

So, as I previously stated I am in Graduate School working on my Master Degree(1st week). This was my first step to get me to understand...I matter. I joined Weight Watchers and made an effort to change my life. I used to make excuses about not wanting to be apart of it, but I am learning so much about myself in the 2nd week o__O and I have been working out while at work, and walking in the afternoon after dinner. Ladies, don't get lost in your relationship(being a mom, wife and daughter)as women we lose who we are to give to the ones we love...there's nothing wrong with that but, if there is no you, how can you love on your family.

Slowly getting re-acquainted with my mojo.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Workout Day 1

It's official, I have started to work out and let me tell you this was the toughest workout ever. Lunges, curls, planks and sit ups and all of it was timed circuit training. There are a group of people who workout during their lunch at my work and one of the girls(whose lost about 70lbs or so) invited me to work out with them last week. Well, I finally got up the nerve to put myself out there and I feel so good that I did it. But, honey, I was in so much pain, out of breath, out of shape, so fat...but, I will keep doing this. Its really no excuse. I'm so freaking excited about it. I don't know what to do! I hope I can keep this excitement know how that goes.

Anyway, my Weight Watchers at work person is on vacation this week and I found a meeting in my area and went last night and let me just tell you I will not continue to go to this meeting spot(lots of old people) and I couldn't like get with them cause they were kind of clickish too. Oh well, I was -1 and I had to recalculate my points. I'm happy to be down 1, but I have a goal to meet and I will make that goal by December 14th! 198, here I come.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010


I had to stop in and vent. I will not beat myself up, but in order to be successful in losing this weight you have to PLAN AHEAD. Now, I have been doing well and I have been trying to stay on track, but why the hell did I not bring my lunch today. Thank God for rain! As I left work today(to go and pick up something for lunch, because I was tired of eating salad and did not make a lunch)I was driving around in the rain and pulled into a Thai restaurant, my fave Grilled Cheese and Tomato Soup and a chinese food place, it was WAAAY TO FAR OF A PARKING SPOT, seeing that is was rainy and I found myself falling into my old habits. I wanted to just go on impulse and have the foods that I wanted, but THANK GOD for the rain! I politely kept driving until I got back to work and had a cup of split pea soup and a sugar free vanilla chai latte...lunch only cost me 6 points. Getting ready to plan my lunch and dinner for tomorrow. I have to lose this weight and I have to weigh in tonight.

In what area of your life, do you feel like you need to plan ahead!?

Monday, September 27, 2010

Weekend Upsets and Wins

This was my first weekend on Weight Watchers and let me tell you:

I went to visit my god-sister(BFF) and her little kiddies we had a blast, did a little shopping and I had no problem staying on plan, getting a little exercise in all of the walking at the outlet malls felt good.
Yesterday, I had a baby shower and my aunts cooked and do you know there was not but, 1 vegetable there! green beans, ummmm, somebody help! I had the green beans, but everyone was razzing me because of it. With the holidays coming up and the changes that I think we need to make and when I say we, My hubby decided to follow WW's plan as well, that will be a very good thing for us, as we will both have the same plan to get in gear and lose the weight togehter. My hubby weighs 344lbs. He wants to lose and look good in his clothes, he's well proportioned, but losing this weight will be great in getting him to be healthy and more active. My upset(prior to him telling me that he will participate in WW) he had Popeye's chicken, I had the red beans and rice and that was not apart of plan. I was bummed at first, but I have to realize that there will be temptation and if I give in, I have to move along and not beat myself up for it. So, today, I am fully on plan, keeping track of my points drinking my water and staying focused.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

It's Official!!!

Today, began my first day on Weight Watchers. There are a total of 15 people in the class and some of these people are Lifetime folks and others have been doing this for a little under a year with great results. Our class touched on some pretty good subjects and I was weighed in today and I am down 1.8lbs from last week! I measured by waist and bust last week and I was pretty upset with myself. Bust is 42 inches and my waist is 46 inches...come on. I'm looking forward to this journey, I CANNOT wait to take it all in. I know there will be ups and downs and I will have some issues throughout but, I am looking forward to changing my lifestyle and in turn helping my family as well.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Weight Watchers

So, I spoke to my know the hot ones I was telling you about and they did it on Weight Watchers. My company has Weight Watchers come in 3 months and we only pay 50% of the price, and get this they work out for an hour before lunch and have lunch at their desk while working! Can you believe that? All I had to do was open my mouth and ask...smh at myself. It's ok, I'm feeling really good this week, I have been eating better and being active and just feel all around good. Weight Watchers will begin this Tuesday and I am so excited! We have a lot of supportive people and this is for sure a lifestyle change and I can't wait to be the new me, mentally and physically!

SN: I had to post this picture of JHud. I adore her!

Tuesday, September 14, 2010


This is my moment of truth. It took me a while to finally make a decision on this and today I am down right upset with myself and if I put this out here then I am held accountable and my goals have to be met. I'm so upset with myself I have been telling myself that I am going to do this and that and blah and blah, but today, I decided to use the digital scale in my gym at work(YES, I have a freaking gym, fully equipped with treadmills, eliptical, step machines, weight training, resistance balls and free weights). My husband got me a Bally's membership at the beginning of the year and I can't believe that I am not taking advantage of this stuff. It's like while I was eating everyone around me was losing weight! I was the smallest fat girl in the everyone and I mean EVERYONE who was bigger than me, looks freaking HOT! They are on a journey of a healthier lifestyle and I'm on the couch eating carbs! Listen here, I am stuck in a rut. I get up, shower, get kids dressed, off to work, work for 8 hours, go get kids, (grocery store or run errands some time), back home, cook dinner, give baths and watch tv. It's bad. My classes for the fall will begin on the 22nd of this month and my day to day will change, but I need to add workouts and eating right into this equation. I have decided to take this one step further. I am disgusted with what I have done to myself, but now I have to be honest with myself. I am morbidly obese. I went to the Toledo Zoo with my kids over the past weekend and my feet and back ached afterwards(I'm 29), my kids are 1 and 3 I need to be here for them. I haven't had any medical issues per my doctor...I'm healthy(but I'm morbidly obese). I know that I need to change my life and so, I have decided to log my journey, and all honesty I'm very uncomfortable with posting these pictures, but I have here starts the journey. Pray for me. I have to be around for the LOVES OF MY LIFE.
I weighed myself today...
Starting weight: 221.8
Pants size:14/16
Height: 5'2
Shirt Size: XL, 1x
BMI: 40.6

Monday, September 13, 2010

Blog Identity

When I first decided to blog, I wanted to talk about the people I adored the family! But, as time has progressed I have decided that I want my blog to be about all things me! Family, love, weight loss, new journey's and I have decided to take you all along on the paths with me.

Emotional Eating

Its so funny how you can ask God for things and he just gives it to you. I have been struggling with my weight since late 2010. My grandmother passed away that year and it was really hard on me, she had a bout with cancer and she got really sick. I ate to cope with her sickness. My grandmother helped my mom raise me, she put me in private schools and took care of me while my mom worked. She was always there to guide me, give me advice or just cook me some of my favorite meals. When she fell ill I was living in GA doing an internship that summer and when I found out I was devastated, welp I ate myself better and 20lbs later, I was sad at the way I looked, but then life continued to happen and I gained more and more weight. I thought while in high school I was not a big eater, I worked 2 jobs and wore a size 5/6 at my smallest. I know that's a different time, however, my goal is to lose this weight. I said all that to say, I have been struggling this past week with getting into the eating right habits and having my water and getting in activity time and while sitting in church yesterday listening to the announcements, one of our members(whose a doctor), start discussing emotional eating, what causes it and how to cope with. Well, you know what causes to cope with it is another issue. It's basically asking God what is His will for your life and start addressing it. You can also, put together a vision board and I thought that's a great idea, lets start addressing these issues. Pray for me.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


It feels like winter out! What the heck, it seems like yesterday it was 83...oh my bad, it was! What the heck!? Anyway, back on my grind with work and goals that I have set for myself. My first goal is to lose 15lbs by Halloween and it's totally doable. I just need to stay focused and work on knocking it out the park. In order to reach this goal, I will:

Follow Weight Watchers Core Plan
Workout while at Work 4 days a week
Drink Lots of water

If I follow that plan, I believe I can reach my goal. And for reaching that goal I will get myself a really cute top from Faith21. I won't weigh myself until Monday, this week started today for me, back at work since Thursday last week.

Once I've reached this goal and I will reach it. I will post before and after pictures and set my second goal. My goal is to lose 50+ lbs. I will keep you posted! Keep me in your prayers and I will do the same for you.